Living the Life of Your Dreams!

Is it really possible to live the life of our dreams? or is it an old cliche? or maybe a lucky strike that only hits a few fortunate ones? What does it really mean to live the life of our dreams? Do we actually know?

dreams

Living the life of your dreams has little to do with accumulating wealth or reaching specific standards of comfort, but it has a lot to do with living with passion, with presence, living in the flow and being happy and grateful everyday. Living the life of your dreams simply means aligning yourself with your own unique purpose, with the fulfillment of your own and unique mission in this lifetime.

Each one of us came to this world on a mission (believe it or not), it is not by chance that we were born, and it is not by chance that each one of us is unique in many different ways. There is a purpose for our life and our passage into this earth, and it is not until we connect with that mission and purpose that we can truly live the life of our dreams. Living our mission has also a lot to do with contributing to the world in a unique and meaningful way. If we only focus on what the world can give us, without focusing on what WE can give to the world, we will most likely miss our purpose altogether.

Every child is born with a little seed that carries their life’s purpose and potential in it. if a child is given true freedom to explore their innate talents and interests from the very beginning, and is respected for their strengths instead of labeled for their flaws, that child has a much better chance to figure out his/her purpose in life. More often than not, we try to make children “fit into” the cookie-cutter model of the person they are supposed to become as opposed to allowing them to blossom into the person they already are.

Teaching our kids to compete, to be better than others, to be “winners”, etc. is really damaging, because it teaches them that there isn’t enough for everybody, that in order to be happy one has to win and to be better than others to make sure they have their fair share. This brings in a world of competition instead of cooperation, a world of individuals instead of communities, a world of have and have-not’s, a world of winners and losers, a world that is far from ideal… this is the world we live in, and we can change it, one child at a time. We all have this responsibility as adults and role models, and we need to keep this in mind.

We don’t need to be better than others, we just need to be the best version of ourselves, we need to let our baby seed blossom, not by winning over others, having more than others, comparing ourselves to others, but by finding our unique purpose and living it, then there is no room for competition, just for fulfillment. Every person has a totally different purpose and they are all worthwhile.

Living the life of your dreams or rather finding your purpose and embodying it, may take a lot of deconstructing old patterns and beliefs, it may also take you away from people or situations that don’t support you truth. But there is no wasted time, life is a journey of discovery and growth, so instead of resenting all the time spent in less than ideal situations, relationships, jobs, etc. be thankful for those experiences and struggles as they will probably bring you closer to finding yourself.

When you find your true purpose and mission in life and you start to embody it, you will live from a place of authenticity and truth, so everything else will come into alignment with that truth: your work, the place you live in, the relationships in your life, etc. Living your truth takes courage, but living in such a way is not only a dream but a necessity, because if we don’t, our whole system (our body) starts to fail.

Ayurveda, which is one of the world’s oldest medical systems, originated in India more than 3,000 years ago, refers to the divine role in which each soul participates from birth as an important part of healing. Healing is a matter of supporting the body to fulfill its birth role, thus allowing the soul to fulfill its spiritual task for this incarnation.

The word Dharma, used widely and sometimes misunderstood, basically means the Law that “upholds, supports or maintains the regulatory order of the universe”, according to this law, every single one of us (and every other living being) has a role to play in the harmony of the whole, which is to say we all have a unique mission and purpose that will bring harmony not only to our own lives but to the whole world.

In that light, I would like to share two excerpts from the Bhagavad Gita about Dharma:

“Better is one’s own dharma thought imperfectly carried out than the dharma of another carried out perfectly”

“Better is death in the fulfillment of one’s dharma, for to follow the law of another brings great spiritual peril”

In the search for the life of our dreams, we can start by finding what really moves us, inspires us, attracts us, interest us, and see how that aligns with our unique talents (because they usually go hand in hand), and try to bring more and more of that into our lives, even if that means making changes, sometime small sometime big, but do not be afraid, if you are in the right path, everything else will fall back in place….

I wanted to share a video that really moved me, it is about a young girl that was lucky to find her passion and calling at a very early age, her story is remarkable and at the end she encourages us all to not give up on finding our mission for this life, it is a little long but a true gem. A 23 year-old mother of 30

An last but not least, another Inspiring video (shorter and more generic)

Have a good week!

Suggested articles:

How to find yourself when you have lost yourself by Rebecca Lammersen

Rumi, Dharma and Passion by Catie Joyce

Living my Dream by Dagmar Spremberg


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Finding True Peace

Last week I attended a Peace Ceremony at my kids school and in the program, there was a quote that I really liked, and I wanted to reflect on it today. Here it is:

“Peace is not the absence of noise, trouble or hard work,
it is to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart” 
– Unknown

peacedove

This is such a powerful statement, and so important to keep in mind!
as we often hope to find peace in a place of quiet, harmony, and calm; but true and lasting peace comes only if we carry that place within us.

If we are not at peace in our hearts, we can be in the most beautiful and quiet place, and have total harmony around us but still find turmoil and chaos inside; but if we are at peace in our hearts, it doesn’t matter what the outside circumstances are, we can still remain calm and in harmony through anything.

One of the best ways to find peace in our hearts is by letting go, letting go of control. This is not easy and goes against a strong human tendency, but the more we practice it, the more we become good at it and it eventually becomes easier and easier.

Our human tendency is to control everything in our lives, we like to have certainty about future events, we like to know what is coming, we like to plan and predict our future, etc. But no matter how well we do, life keeps changing and we can’t predict much of what happens, as there are too many factors at play.

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”
– Lao Tzu

This does not mean that we have NO saying in the way our lives unfold, in fact we have a LOT to do with the way our lives unfold, but our real strength and power comes from being open to change, being totally present and accepting our reality as is.

If we are open to change, as opposed to clinging to the way things are or the way we want them to be, we are part of the flow of life which is always changing, and in that way we find harmony with it.

If we are totally present, we can live more fully, every single moment of our lives with no interference from our past, our fears, our predictions, etc, and that way we can be more in touch with reality, which in turn will allow us to have more clarity. Clarity will then help us make the best decisions at the appropriate times, and take the actions that are best for us.

And finally, when we accept our reality as is, we stop resisting what is, and this will free our energy so we can use it more wisely towards better outcomes.

So, letting go of control is the first and more important step towards finding real peace, and it is worth all the efforts it may require, because true and lasting peace has no price.

“If you let go a little, you find a little peace, if you let go a lot, you find a lot of peace,
if you let go absolutely, you find absolute peace”

– Ajahn Chah

So, start looking for peace inside your heart and you will eventually find it for good!

Have a good week!

Related post: Practicing Acceptance and Letting go of Control…


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Moving into the 4th dimension… Is this the evolutionary leap? (Part II)

This post was previously posted on: 2baware.net

So, as promised, here is the second part of my post started last week. Before you read any further, if you did not read last week’s post, I recommend you do it first. Read last week’s post

awakeningto4thdimension

Ok, so lets move on to the exciting realm of the 4th dimension!

The 4th dimension (in the context of this post, that is) is a stage of higher awareness (or consciousness) that many human beings are already experiencing, to various degrees. Many more are having the opportunity to realize its presence, which is the first step towards experiencing it.

I once heard an interesting phrase: “The human journey is one that will take us from Animal stage to God stage” in other words from unconsciousness to pure consciousness, and it seems like we are getting closer to the latter.

Consciousness can also be called: The Universe, The Source, The Life Force, All that Is, even God. However, the name we give it is not really important, because no word can really describe it, but since we communicate through language, we need to name it somehow.

What I mean by consciousness is basically the experience of our true essence and reality. Note that I use the word experience, as opposed to knowledge, because consciousness is not a concept that could be grasped by our intellect, our thinking mind, or our rationale; it can ONLY be experienced.

Now that we are clear about what I mean by Consciousness, we can say that at a higher dimension of consciousness, we will start to experience certain things, that are qualities of that dimension. This said, everybody is on his/her own journey, so the intensity to which we may experience it is unique to every individual.

At this point in our world, the 3rd and 4th dimensions are overlapping, so we are all at a different point in this transition. However, we are all being influenced by cosmic energies that are speeding up the shift and stimulating our perceptions, so there is now a greater chance to move forward towards the 4th dimension faster, but sadly, not everybody is ready nor willing to do it. So, what are the qualities of the 4th dimension?

Qualities of the 4th Dimension:

  1. Time disappears, there is no more past and future, there is only the NOW
    This means that we let go of the illusion of psychological time and we enter eternity as: the ETERNAL NOW, which is all that really exists. Although we may still use time as a frame of reference for practical purposes, and to navigate our physical existence, we will drop all emotional charges from the past and all fearful projections into the future. Past and future will no longer have any bearing on our decisions and actions, we will therefore be free to act on what is real and true.If you would like to read more about this concept, I highly recommend Eckart Tolle’s book: The Power of Now, which explains this in great detail.
  2. We move into Introspection
    People are forced to look inside themselves to find the causes or their suffering, they will realize that the answers can only come from the inside and not the outside. This is a journey into our inner beings, our souls, our deepest essence and it will allow us to see what we are really made of. At the same time, it will highly decrease negative feelings/emotions toward the outside world, such as blame, anger, fear, guilt, etc.
  3. We move towards Oneness and Co-creation
    We feel true Oneness with all that exists, our sense of duality fades and that gives us enormous power to co-create. We are more able to feel compassion and to always work in cooperation with others, as opposed to in competition. We have the true realization that everybody is connected as one, so we act on what is best for all.
  4. We have Choice, we are Free!
    We realize that we have control over our thoughts, our emotions and our fears, so we are not slaves to them anymore. We move from reaction to response, which gives us great peace and freedom. We start living by design and not by default.
  5. We attune more to the Light and less to the Darkness
    We will become more sensitive to negative energies, and we will avoid them instinctively, for instance, we will have less tolerance for violent movies or images, we will be less willing to engage in negative conversations, etc. we will gear more towards clean and positive energies and people.

So as you can see, all the qualities of the 4th dimension are rather positive, there is nothing to be afraid of, on the counter, there is so much to look forward to! However, this is only if we are able to LET GO of negative patterns that are keeping us bound to the 3rd dimension, and sometimes letting go can be scary. So, this ends my post on the 4th Dimension and the Evolutionary Leap.

Have a great week!

A Tribute to my Grandmother

Last week, on Monday night, my dear Grandmother passed away. I want to dedicate this post to her, to everything she meant to me, and to the reflections I’ve had following her passing.

mamielonlon

In thinking of her and evoking all the memories I have of the times we shared, I realize once again, how incredibly important it is to bring quality and love when we are in the presence of our family, our friends and ultimately every human being.

My grandmother was French, so I didn’t see her very often, I grew up in Ecuador and then moved to the US, so she and I had always been separated by a large ocean of distance. However, I feel, with great relief that every moment I shared in her presence was filled with joy, complicity and laughter; I feel like even though the quantity of time we spent together was short, the quality of it was great.

My mom always says very wisely, that we have to make sure we enjoy and cherish our loved ones while they are alive, so as not to have any regrets, guilt and unsolved resentments when they leave the physical plane. And I feel that I did that with my grandma. I was not very good at keeping in touch, that is my only regret…

I remember climbing in her bed when I was a little girl and she was visiting us in Ecuador; or making my first crèche for Christmas with her, she had many ideas to make it unique; or the times as a teenager when we would stroll the French village markets arm in arm, trying on clothes and funny hats. I remember baking in her kitchen and eating her delicious meals. So many rich memories of love and companionship come to me now and bring tears to my eyes.

My grandma wasn’t perfect, but then again, nobody is, and she did what she could with the tools she had, which is what we all do. I always loved her just as she was and saw in her mostly her qualities: she was full of life and determination, she had a very young spirit and believed every age had its charm (and she proved it), she never let herself go, she was vibrant, smart, beautiful and brave!

I remember she started piano and oil painting lessons in her 80s! She was a living example that learning never ends, unless we decide to stop it. Maybe that is why her mind was sharp till the last day.

I recall when, as a teenager I told her I did not want to have kids because I was disillusioned with the state of the world, and she (a mother of 6) told me that no matter how dark the circumstances look there is always a light at the other side of the tunnel and we have to focus on it, even when we can’t see it. For someone who was a young mother when her husband went to war, who lived through the German occupation of WW2, and who lost 2 of her children tragically, she surely knew how dark life can get, but she always stood tall and kept going!

I am thankful for all the years I shared with her, she passed at 96 after a long and full life and although the moments we were together were scattered through time and distance, they were wonderful. She always lived in my heart and will continue to do for as long as I live.

Living physically away from people we love can be very hard, everyone handles the distance differently, but loosing someone who is far away is even harder. Our everyday routine is unchanged, the loss seems unreal, and we have to digest it slowly, we have to find some closure on our own. My relief is, again, knowing that the times we shared where filled with high quality.

Some of the reflections I wanted to share and the things I want to remember following this loss are:

  • If we bring love, acceptance and forgiveness to the people around us, we will have no regrets when they leave.
  • The most important is the quality of the time we spend with someone, not the quantity.
  • The effort of keeping in touch with our loved ones is worth it, and we need to carve the time for it.
  • It is important to find ways to mourn at the distance, either by crying our eyes out, taking a day off to rest, calling your friends to talk about it, looking at pictures, writing letters, etc. We need to let the pain flow so that it leaves our body eventually, instead of locking it in our hearts.
  • Enjoy your loved ones while you have them, dedicate them your full attention when you are with them!

I know the last point is probably easier to do with someone who lives far and you seldom see than with someone that you see every day and therefore have more opportunities for conflict. However, this practice applies to everyone around you and it is worth doing, no matter the effort it takes. Be fully in their presence when you are together and see them always through the eyes of love, no matter what the circumstances are.

I recently shared a little card on Facebook that I liked very much and I want to copy it here: The card has the image of two elderly parents and it says:

“Parents are not eternal, call them, visit them, bring them your kids, invite them for dinner, get them their favorite treat, hug them and laugh with them. If necessary let them talk and listen to them lovingly and patiently, tomorrow might be too late.

This is not only true with elderly parents but with everybody we love, no matter their age, we don’t know how long they will be with us, so start today bringing quality to the time you spend with them.

Have a great week!


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Avoid Unnecessary Hurt

I recently came across a quote that I found interesting and I wanted to share it with you today:

“When people hurt you over and over, think of them like sand paper.
They may scratch and hurt you a bit, but in the end, you end up polished and they end up worn out.”

– Chris Colfer

pinkflowers

Although by no means we should allow people to hurt us over and over, it is important to keep in mind that we have little control over what other people say or do, but we certainly have control over our own emotions and reactions.

I strongly believe that people are not out there to hurt you, but they have their own issues and challenges and if they can’t keep their negative emotions under control (envy, resentment, anger, etc.), they may say or do things that hurt others; whether they do it on purpose or not, it is still a result of their own lack of emotion control. Your reaction is also the result of your own emotion control.

You can choose today not to let other people’s comments or actions bring you down, you can decide to grow in understanding and wisdom and raise above it or, you can sink in despair, anger, resentment,t etc. But remember, it is always YOUR choice!

Some people believe they have little control over their emotions and they feel victims of their circumstances, but the truth is we always have a choice, and we need to become responsible for our own well-being, therefore responsible for our own emotions and reactions. Once we accept this simple truth, we can work towards achieving peace by learning to tame our emotions, one of the best ways to do this is to quiet our minds, because our thoughts and beliefs are responsible for our emotions.

We are not victims of our surroundings, we are the creators of our life, so we can choose how to live, it takes some effort and commitment but it is worth every minute spent on it. Knowing that you don’t depend on others for your happiness is an empowering thought. This to me was a wonderful realization, one that gave me freedom from the people around me and the circumstances around me.

This does not mean we should let people get away with anything, when dealing with difficult relationships we should certainly take action to prevent further hurt. But ultimately others can only hurt us as much as we allow them to. Below is a short list of what we can do to start:

  • Avoid people who tend to say or do hurtful things, if you can
  • Talk to them when you are both calm and at peace, let them know your feelings, without blaming them
  • If neither of the above are possible, practice detachment and self control when you are in their presence

The list above can be used in many different contexts and situations, not only in regards to difficult relationships but also for difficult circumstances. If you find yourself in a situation that is less than desirable, you have 3 choices:

  • You remove yourself from the situation, OR
  • You fix the situation, OR
  • You accept the situation and learn to live with it, in peace

As Eckart Tolle would say: “resisting your present reality can only lead to frustration and despair.” By resisting he means resenting your current situation and allowing it to bring you down.

Some people find it hard to believe that they can become immune to hurtful actions and words from others, but they are hurtful only to the extent that we allow them to be. With some conscious work on yourself, you can little by little attain freedom from external circumstances. If you want to read more on this topic, I have a few more postings that might be of interest to you:

Have a great week!

The Truth about Multitasking

In this fast-paced world, we have come to believe that “Multitasking” is a great skill, a needed one in fact, something all of us should master and can boost about. Well, the truth is, multitasking is not so good for you.

multitasking

According to Wikipedia: “Human multitasking is the best performance by an individual of appearing to handle more than one task at the same time. The term is derived from computer multitasking.”

This new word: “multitasking” has become a synonym of efficiency, speed, professionalism, etc. which is a total lie, another illusion we live under, an illusion imposed by the crazy pace of life we are all victims of.

Constantly switching from one task to another means we are putting less attention on each task and affecting the way our brain performs, we are more likely to make errors and ironically we waste more time.

From a very early age now, we subject our young kids to tight agendas, too many extracurricular activities which, in my opinion, contributes partly to the latest epidemic of ADD and ADHD. Our kids have to move from one activity to the next with no break, and often because of lack of time they have to handle more than one task at a time, like doing their homework while eating their supper for instance. We are making our kids handle too many things at once, which is not healthy, especially for a developing brain.

As human beings, our nature, our essence, our true self is meant to BE, rather than to DO. This does not mean we should sit around and do nothing, what it means is that we have a right and a real need to find a space to just BE, like a tree, like a flower, like an animal, we need to just BE, and stop all the doing.

What happens now is that we have totally neglected our state of “being” to favor our state of “doing” to the point that we have lost touch with our true self.

We feel like we have to be doing something all the time, because we are not comfortable with just being, we are not comfortable with our most innate and natural state. So we do more and more and “thanks” to our modern technology, we now can do many things at the same time, we can send an email, while we walk the dog and listen to music; we can be on the phone while we work on the computer and eat lunch, it is simply INSANE!

Besides, this new idea of multitasking is taking all the fun out of actually enjoying any particular task, because we are not truly present when doing anything. In positive psychology, there is a very interesting concept called “flow,” it was introduced by psychologist: Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.

Flow is the mental state in which a person is fully involved in an activity to the point of loosing track of time, this state induces great joy and satisfaction, which in turn constitutes great fuel for our brain and our overall well being.

For some people the state of flow only happens when they are forced to be totally focused in a certain task, for instance running a marathon, or climbing a mountain, these are activities where there is no room for distraction, so no room for any other parallel activity nor thought. Many people can still experience flow, however, while doing things like: painting, dancing, etc. this is especially true of artists, when they enter a state of deep inspiration.

One of the beauties of being in a state of flow is that it takes you right to the present moment, nothing else matters but what you are doing, and you are bringing all your focus to it, this means you are fully in the present. Which brings us back to the concept of being as opposed to doing. If we are in the present moment, totally present with the task at hand, we are “being” not just doing.

So the state of flow goes against the idea of multitasking, where we have no time for true concentration, no time for full attention, no time for real enjoyment, no time for being. We are not wired for multitasking, and we are creating unnecessary stress in our bodies by doing so, no matter how simple the tasks may seem.

The idea of being fully present at every moment means we do things in a mindful way, that is, in a conscious and aware state. When we do anything mindfully we are more likely to do it right, at the right time and with better results. So I encourage you to rethink your multitasking this week!

If you wish to read more about Flow, I highly recommend the book: Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

Have a great week!


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Email: silvamethod@cox.net

Change the Dream

A few days ago I came across a very interesting story that I would like to reflect on today.

The story I read was about the Ashuar, an indigenous group from the rainforest of my home country Ecuador. This group reached out to environmentalist groups and global activists in order to transmit their message to our civilized world (if we can call it that…)

shuardance
Photo Courtesy of http://www.nationalgeographic.com

These people believe that our civilized world has created a reality based on a collective dream, a dream that has become a nightmare and is affecting the entire planet, it may even drive our human race to its collapse. And, according to the Ashuar: “The world is as you dream it.”

In their view, we live in “the dream of more”: more factories, more companies, more houses, more cars, more of everything, and according to them “we can’t really change our everyday actions because at their root, will always be the dream we have of our future and we will always act consistent with that dream. However, the dream itself can be changed in the space of one generation and the time to do it is now” (source: The Soul of Money – Lynne Twist)

The way I interpret the meaning of “dream” in the context of the Ashuar’s message, is the equivalent to our beliefs, the ways we see the world and the assumptions we make as a society. This “dream” is not necessarily true, but it drives our lives and the way we act on others and on our planet. To me the “dream of more” represents materialism, the culture of money and overall the capitalist system that now rules most of the world.

Also, in this message I find an interesting parallel to the law of attraction that states that what you focus on and give your attention to (whether is good or bad for you) will manifest in your life. Aside form our individual focus and attention, we also have a collective focus (or dream), a collective set of beliefs that brings about the world we live in. Our “dream” therefore is our deep seated beliefs about life, that have been around for many generations and have become the norm, most people don’t even question them at all, it is what it is and it rules our lives and our social systems.

But what IF we started to question it? what if we tried to detach ourselves from this collective dream?

Each and every one of us is part of this dream and we have an individual responsibility to change it if we want to survive as a race and live a more fulfilling life. As the Ashuar say, we can’t truly change our actions unless we start by changing the dream and we can, one individual at a time.

Our own journey into the realization of this dream is very important because it will contribute to a greater change, it will bring a positive shift on our societies.

To me this message rings true and it gives me hope, hope that there are enough people in this world that are raising to a higher level of awareness and they can help others move into it, hope that this message will spread so that there will be more and more people questioning the current dream we live in.

If you are interested to read or learn more about this topic, here are a couple good resources:

Awakening the Dreamer Symposium

Dream Change further readings

Have a great week!


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